Does My Reflection Look Like Jesus?

Ever struggle to “look like Jesus” in front of your most familiar folks? Lori Wildenberg shares her discoveries.

Elisa

Does my Reflection Look Like Jesus?

By Lori Wildenberg

We had one day left to enjoy our Minnesota lake vacation, then it was back to the Colorado mountains. Storms can start fairly quickly in the Midwest. A darkened sky and a big wind are the signals to get off the lake. As the weather was changing, my husband, Tom, decided we had time to get the fishing boat off the lake and secured in the garage before the storm erupted. It made sense since we were leaving the next day.

I was grumpy, “The weather is changing, let’s wait.”

“No. Let’s do it now, so we don’t have to bail the boat later. We won’t be using it again anyway.”

Reluctantly, I got into the boat to go to the public access and meet Tom. Jaime, my daughter-in-love, accompanied me. Since the boat was out of gas, we needed to row. Jaime attempted to row but the wind worked against her. Rowing and wind are an incompatible duo. I jumped into the water to be the human rudder.

We affectionately call the bay where the public access is located, The Turtle Pond. It is full of turtles, both mud and snappers, a beaver resides there in a mansion not a lodge, and the water is weedy. Smart people avoid swimming in this part of the lake. But rudders must remain in the water. I could see Tom and our six-year-old grandson waiting for us on shore with the boat trailer.

My annoyance at my situation and at my husband grew. I was swimming in the swamp with weeds, the beaver, and the snapping turtles. Why couldn’t we have waited to pull the boat out?

“This is so nasty. I’m feeling not very happy right now,” I called out over the wind. My reflection looked a lot more like me and a lot less like Jesus.

“Mimi, why are you not happy?” My grand tuned into my words and tone. Tom wisely chose not to engage.

“Modeling. Roles models.” Jaime quickly and good-naturedly articulated what was important in the moment.

Her words reminded me my grandson was watching this scene play out. I could choose to demonstrate my ability to manage frustration and irritation with respect and self-control, or I could keep grumbling. Thankfully, Jaime spoke up and helped me put the swampy scene in perspective. (I think Tom was even more thankful.)*

I am able to be polite, thoughtful, respectful, kind, and considerate to many people outside the four walls of my home. Yet this swampy scene reminded me that I can get pretty sloppy with the people closest to me.

Are you like me? You want to reflect Jesus but find it easier to be like Jesus around people who are strangers or acquaintances?

Why would I do this? Why am I not at least as kind and respectful to my husband as I am to a stranger? Why am I able to stop “the thing” I’m involved in and greet a guest but continue to do “my thing” and barely look up when my husband walks in the door?

James Dobson in his book, Your Legacy: The Greatest Gift, wisely points out that the first 5 minutes you spend with someone sets the tone for the rest of the time you are together. This is so true. I can set a pleasant tone with those I love. Why would I not do this?

Galatians 5:22-23 reveals the qualities of the fruit of the spirit as love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. As I look back on the swampy scene and my sometimes-sloppy interaction with my husband, God reminds me my spiritual fruit has some worms. My reaction to frustrating moments, disagreements, or suffering is often fleshly, not in the Spirit. I want to be the person God has created me to be. I want to look more like my Savior and less like me.

Scripture tells me, I am created in the image of God. I guess it is time I started looking like it.

So God created mankind in his own image, in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them. Genesis 1:27

*From Grandparents Make Grand Partners, by Lori Wildenberg, (Nashville: D6 Family Ministries, 2025), 87-88.

Lori Wildenberg, licensed parent and family educator, author, and national speaker, is passionate about helping families build connections that last a lifetime and beyond. Lori is the author or co-author of seven books including the newly released Grandparents Make Grand Partners: How to Have an Eternal Impact on Your Grandchild’s Life and the award-winning Messy Hope: Help Your Child Overcome Anxiety Depression, or Suicidal Ideation. Lori is married to her college sweetheart, Tom. They have four adult children, 3 in-laws, and 5 grands. A perfect day in Lori’s world is a hike with Tom, any combination of family members, and Toby the family goldendoodle. The Wildenberg home is nestled in the foothills of the Rocky Mountains. loriwildenberg.com